Hello Patients:
A quick run down of the past weeks performance and a reminder that this week’s game will be at 2:00 pm.
Well to the re-cap.
As it stands now, Team Triple by-pass is on the cusp on a streak, 3 losses in a row. Hey consistency in any field pays off. However, we can really put an exclamation point on our rebound by beating this weeks opponent, who are currently undefeated. I think we have the guns to pull this victory off.
The Coast to Coast award goes to Balmoris Mencher who not only prevented the opponent from scoring but ran the interception the entire field for a touchdown. However, there are reports that our in-love field leader is letting his happiness leak onto his field play and wasn’t as fiery as normal.
Luckily for Team By-pass, Balmo’s love kryptonite Marissa Mencher carried the family torch on offense, in true anything you do I can do better, Marissa took several snaps as Team quarterback and showed why she is the boss, by marching the team down the field. We hope that her next drive will be capped off with a touchdown.
The “No its not a tattoo, my QB was trying to kill me award” goes to Val Pensa, who is probably still sporting a nice red spot on her stomach from the football landing spot.
The “Please don’t make me happy award” goes to Martha Forrester. On her return performance to the grid iron, Martha’s play seemed to have dropped a peg when she was asked to be nice to the opposing team. To solve that problem and get her back to her great playing form, this week anytime you are talking about the opposing team in front of Martha they shall be addressed as her former boyfriends.
The “Dirt and Water equal Mud’ award goes to Maylin Hago, who managed to make it look good falling in the mud while getting in there and breaking up a few passes. Stay clean and play hard chica.
The “I know I can do better, I’ll show you all” award goes to our favorite drink and TV star, Hugo Reyes. While he dazzled with 2 catches, he made all cry with two drops. but then again 50/50 is not bad odds. We hope Apple Juice can bring the pain he so often reminds us he can belt out this coming week.
The “Screw that I was here holding the fort for 2 weeks award goes to our favorite all star, Ketal Patel, who while he did not provide us with his usual level of circus act offensive power, did keep the defense on their toes with his gravity defying scrambling abilities.
The “David Letterman Player of the week”, this award is going to be a permanent addition for the rest of the season, as we have several personalities pop in and out of our team orbit. This weeks recipient came from parts unknown in Western Pennsylvania, where the woman are scarce and the cows are scared. Jaime ‘I got the looks and the better genes’ Paredes showed awesome skills when he put away the opposing teams offense by sacking their QB on 4th down. way to go.
The “I did excellent cause I reported it” award goes to Jairo Paredes. Union city’s own Walter Kronkite reports that not only did he have 6 catches, 3 of which were for points, but that they were all circus catches, cause he had one arm tied behind his back. For that distinction as reported by him, we give him the Player of the Weak award.
The Missing Our doctors Appointment list:
I Great Secretary Marenco, who will be making my return appearance after spending several missed visits assuring myself future employment.
Marvin ‘Gotta tree to plant, a child to save’ Bosi who alleges he will make an appearance this coming week, unless of course world peace is threatened.
Francois ‘Im sooo busy’ Dauder, who like the crazy rabbit in Alice in wonderland always has somewhere, is alleged to be making his first start, barring there are no christening, bar/bas mitzvah, communions, birthdays, showers, weddings, reunions, auctions, gift-wrapping party, ship launch, scholarship dinner, adoption ceremony, etc etc.
Manolo ‘Good Genes’ Torres…making a return from his Eco-voyage of Love, we will be joined by the best gened athlete of all past days. After hiking hundreds of miles in search of the perfect city to go with his perfect genes, Nolo Torres will be back on the field smoking and smoking the competition, watcccch out.
He will be joined by his fellow Laura Croft companion, Brooklyn Lisa Pisa who, also was swinging from the vines in beautiful Costa Rica.
DRINKING Schedule: Right after the game please do not schedule normalcy in your life as we will toasted the rain gods and happy weekends at happy HORA.
TEAM CAPTAIN: Our paper-rock-scissor thrower for this coming week will be the Balrissa Presidnet and CEO, Marissa Mencher.
See you all bright and drunky this Saturday.
All the best
Great Secretary, Julio Marenco
;)
